So, I begin this blog by assuring you, my faithful readers, that I am, in fact, alive. I have not died as some may think. In fact, life is what has prevented me from posting in such a long time. My second order of business is to point out that my good friend Erisiky put up that last post. For anyone who was thrown off by that I have two simple words: HA HA.

But in all seriousness, today I rant specifically about myself. I'm always kinda ranting about me, but today it's just about me. Why is it that I always have to put things off to the last minute? You would think that after the first time I went 48 hours without sleeping I might have learned, but I didn't. You would think after I bombed my first math test, I might realize that I should show up for class, but I don't. You would think that after seven years of letting my grades suffer due to my own laziness that I might start to attempt being a good student, but I'm worse than ever. Why don't I learn? I'm not stupid. Why don't I care? It seems that no matter how hard I try to make myself care about school, I just can't. Or won't. I don't even know which it is. I just know that I don't care. I understand that I need to be here. I've even figured out that God probably wants me here right now. I still just want to go home, though. I'm tired, I'm stressed, I'm broke, and I feel like I'm standing still. It seems like I'm going nowhere fast, and I don't like it. Hopefully, once I get all these gen-eds out of the way things will change. However, the question remains: Will I even make it that far? I'll have to take out another loan. Probably a pretty big one, since I'm in big danger of losing my scholarship. I'm so sick of dealing with money. More specifically, I'm sick of not having any. School is draining all the money out of my bank account, my mom's bank account, and my dad's bank account. What happens when my brother starts next year? God help me!

Hanging by a thread,
Moses